The first time I heard of a premarital questionnaire I thought it was a joke and laughed at the idea. But as I read the questions, I couldn’t believe I went through a marriage without completing one. It wasn’t just me, no one I knew had ever heard of such a thing. It is so critical, especially in today’s society where divorce rates are running high. One ministry of social services in an Arab states reported that in a given year, for every one couple getting married, there were three couples divorcing! While no questionnaire can save a marriage, it may help you avoid one doomed for divorce.
Here’s how it works:
If you go to the ADAMS center in the state of Virginia to get married, the Imam will suggest that you and your fiancee take a 100 question “test” individually, then compare your answers. If they match, you’re good to go. If they don’t, you visit the Imam for a series of premarital counseling sessions.
The questionnaire covers a range of topics: core values, health, raising children, religious relationship, In-laws, friendships and more.
Here’s a sample:
- What are your expectations of marriage?
- What is your definition of wealth? And how do you spend money?
- What is the role of religion in your life?
- Do you support the idea of utilizing baby-sitters and maids?
- Define mental, verbal, emotional, and physical abuse.
They sound simple, but as you run through the list, you’ll find several questions that spark a conversation, debate, or disagreement. So here’s my suggestion, before planning a wedding, get ready for a lifetime commitment.
What do you think of this idea? Would you be willing to do a questionnaire like this before getting married?
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